Unraveling history's alternate timelines

My wander through Pylos in 1300 BCE as documented on Nov 21, 2024

Hydraulic Plow Ignites Mycenaean Cultural Renaissance

Ah, the sights and sounds of Mycenaean Greece! As I stroll through the hills, I can't help but marvel at the simplicity and tranquility that blankets the land—a serenity only disrupted by the rhythmic gush of water that echoes through the fields. It’s not the gentle babbling of brooks, mind you, but the robust, purposeful flow of aqueducts feeding a rather ingenious bit of technology—the hydraulic plow.

Imagine, if you will, the surprise on my face when I first laid eyes on this contrivance. A wooden monstrosity, it resembles a giant lazy dragon, though instead of fire, it spews the labor-saving grace of water. Eurycles, the purported mastermind behind this mighty hydraulic beast, is an inventor possessed of a mind that seems forever teetering on the edge of either brilliance or lunacy. This time, brilliance has won out, giving these ancient Greeks a miracle disguised as farming equipment.

With the oxen benched and the plowmen freed from servitude, I find myself amidst a society quite unlike the Mycenaeans of our own history—these folks have much more free time. They’ve taken to the arts as if Apollo himself decided to host a perpetual talent competition. Every corner of the agora seems alive with poets battling in verse, musicians lost in harmonious ecstasy, and artisans creating pottery that looks like it had a brush with Homer’s narrative flair.

One evening, I was drawn into a gathering where a particularly animated bard was reciting an ode to an "Ox-Free Deity." The audience, a mix of shepherds and nobles, cheered him on, lips stained from the local vintage, their laughter mingling with the sounds of trickling aqueducts. It seems every harvest is now a festival, marked by epic narratives and the copious consumption of a wine that might just convince Dionysus himself to take early retirement.

"the hydraulic plow—it turns more than soil. It turns minds!"

Intrigued by this vibrant outpouring of cultural expression, I found myself befriending a farmer-turned-philosopher named Timaeus. He spoke excitedly about his theories on crop rotations and water management as if discussing the latest epic tragedy. His eyes lit up when I mentioned how their vineyards flourished with such abundance. "Yes, yes," he said, "the hydraulic plow—it turns more than soil. It turns minds!"

But, of course, no innovation is without its unforeseen consequences. During a solemn pause in our conversation (perhaps too much contemplation, or too much wine), Timaeus muttered something about “earth becoming bitter” with a far-off look. He elaborated, rather reluctantly, that the soil was showing signs of salt accumulation—a problem overlooked in their zealous turn towards leisure and lyricism. Yet even this potential crisis is met with a shrug here, as another round of festivities soon sang through the fields.

Roaming the grand palace of Pylos, I'm aware of the indulgence afforded by agricultural surplus. Bureaucrats here, unlike their stressed counterparts in other lands, engage in leisurely debates, each arguing over which aqueduct design would make for the best symposium conversation starter. Oh, the fervor of administering watercourses while never lifting a finger to the plow—a Mycenaean twist on the Olympic spirit!

It’s tempting to wonder if these blissfully dilatory debates will ever address the looming issue beneath the surface—or rather, beneath the sod. Perhaps, like all great civilizations faced with their own hubris, they’ll decide that when the songs are sung and the wine runs dry, it might be time to give the land a rest. Time is relative, after all, and in this quaint corner of history, it moves to a tune that swirls somewhere between merriment and indifference.

As for me, I’ll be sure to return to my own time with tales of a world where plows sing with the voice of streams. But first, there's the matter of acquiring several amphorae of their exquisite vintage. I wonder, will customs back home recognize the strategic value of fermented grapes sprouted from hydraulic ingenuity?

Onward to my next venture—but first, where did I leave that corkscrew?